The Importance of Parental Involvement

By: Alexis Luna

The Importance of Parental Involvement in a Child's Life

Civil Engagement:

In the article, Civic and Democratic Engagement: A Brief Overview, states that Civic Engagement means participating

in activities intended to improve the quality of life in one’s community by addressing issues of public concern, such as

homelessness, pollution, or food insecurity, and developing the knowledge and skills needed to address those issues.

How I define the term civil engagement is that it’s the action of helping a community by making a difference in ways

such as using a voice, promoting things that will be better for the community, and solving problems we are met with,

and this can be both political and non-political. 

What is Parental Involvement: 

According to Enlightium Christian Academy, parental involvement can be done in many forms, such as being a role model, teaching good habits, being able to discipline a child with no problem, and, most importantly, being able to build good relationships between a parent and a child. The article states, “When parents and children interact with each other, learning takes place. Learning is an integral part of generative social practice in the lived-in world.” I believe having a parent figure in your life is very important, especially for a child that is growing and needs guidance and support.

What does an uninvolved parent style look like?

Some examples are:

• Parents ignore their children when they are upset or need attention.

• They expect their child to care for themselves and show no effort to do so.

• They don't respect a child’s interest and learn more about it.

• There is no supervision for a child whatsoever.

How does the absence of parents affect a child?

Children end up facing:

• Depression

• Loneliness

• Anxiety

• Anger

• Behavior problems

• Lack of self-esteem 

• Low achievement motivation

How does this affect me?

Growing up, I had only one parent at a time. I would live with my mom, and every other weekend, I would go visit my dad from Friday to Sunday. What really affected me was that I just felt like when I was with my mom, she was just there. Never really paid too much attention to me and my siblings except the youngest. As a girl growing up, we need that mother figure the most because that’s how we learn to become a woman. I didn’t have any “deep talks” with her, or I would never go to her with my issues because I felt like I was never heard. Now, I live with my dad, and not having a mother figure leads to not having good communication and relationships with both my dad and stepmom. I realized how I am always to myself and avoid having certain conversations with them, and the most important is that if I am struggling with something, I never go to them about it; I just deal with it on my own and never reach out for help from anyone. This also affects my relationship with my partner because I can’t fully communicate my problems or feelings to him. Overall, not having parents involved in my life greatly affected me, and I can see this by comparing the relationships between some of my friends and their parents.

Interviews:

Name: Isaiah Duran

Q: What does the lack of parental involvement do to a child and has this affected you in any way and how?

A: The effect of not having a parent in a child's life is that it makes the child seek the acceptance of said parents more than anything. In my experience, not having a father affected me in a way that I couldn't really know what having a dad is, and it also affected me because I've always looked for a father figure to tell me that he is proud of me.

Name: Hunter Harrison

Q: Knowing that your parents are involved in your life, what are some positives that you think you have with your parents that others might not have?

A: With my parents being involved in my life it made it easier to make friends and go out with them as they would give me rides or money to spend. It allowed me to travel and see the world, learn so much, and experience different things rather than being stuck at home all day. I always felt loved, so during the hard times in my life, I could always count on my parents to be there for me.

Name: Gerardo Velasquez

Q: How much should parents involve themselves in their children's lives?

A: Parents should involve themselves as much as they can in their children's lives at their younger ages. Since they are young and don't know much as well as they are still learning, but as they get older, they can slowly step back and have their child come to them whenever the child wants them to get involved since they are older. As the child grows into an adult, they won't need as much help, but in their early years, being there for them and showing up when needed allows the parent and child to share connections.

Solution: For those like me, the past is something we can't change. There are opportunities one can do to heal from a lack of parental involvement. Some ways that you can start the journey to healing is by learning how to self-parent, having to develop new healthy relationships with other people in your life who care for you, and, if comfortable, reaching out to a professional to talk about mental health and problems. For those who are becoming parents, making sure you have an open mind when your child comes to you and making your child feel they have somewhere to go without judgment or where they feel like an inconvenience is very important to think about when starting a family. Making an effort in a child's life, such as being there and showing up, is something that they will never forget. The main way a child learns is through parental guidance, and if that is missing, it is really challenging for them both as adolescents and adults.

References:

1. He, Yiming, "The effects of parents' absence on the lives of the left-behind children in middle and northern rural China" (2008). Doctoral Dissertations Available from Proquest. AAI3325277.

https://scholarworks.umass.edu/dissertations/AAI3325277 

2. Longley, R. (2022, October 4). What is civic engagement? definition and examples. ThoughtCo. https://www.thoughtco.com/what-is-civic-engagement-definition-and-examples-5072704

3. Solodyankin, Y. V. (2018, December 11). The importance of parental involvement in a child’s life. Enlightium Academy Blog. https://www.enlightiumacademy.com/blog/parent-center/entry/the-importance-of-parental-involvement-in-a-child-s-life